Transforming Jess

Tomorrow is a new dawn and a new day for me. I've been wanting to lose this weight for a long time. I keep on giving up just when I start seeing results. It's because of that that it took 4 years to get down 45 lbs. I've since gained 5 lbs. Today I weighed in at 180.6 lbs. Considering I used to be 220 lbs this isn't necessarily a horrible thing. However, I should be at my goal by now. If only I would keep up with it. It's not the exercise or eating healthy that's stopping me. It's some part of me that doesn't feel I deserve to be thin. I've become so used to being overweight that I'm almost afraid to reach my goal. It sounds silly, I know. I don't quite understand it myself. That's changing though. I've finally reached a point where I'm ready to take my life back into my own hands. Have control. I'm going back to eating healthy, clean foods. I'm going back to exercising on a regular basis. I've decided to try Body For Life. I had a different plan, but Body For Life is also good and I want to give it a try. It's a 12 week program and pretty cool from what I've been reading. I think it's reading the transformation stories on their website. 1 woman lost exactly what I want to lose. She lost 39 lbs (I want to lose 40 lbs) and went from a size 16 to a size 6 (I'm a size 14 now). She started out at roughly the same place I'm at. 12 weeks. I don't really expect to lose all the weight I want to in 12 weeks. Yes, it can be done. But I want to be realistic and realistically I will probably lose about 30 lbs. Still, I will be very happy if that is so! It also helps that I have a great support system. My husband, who is also doing BFL, and my girlfriend who is doing her own thing. All three of us are trying to get fit. I'm the only one overweight. They both want to eat healthy and clean too. We're going to help each other reach our goals. I'm feeling very optimistic.