Wishing

Hi,

My name is Lindsey and I am 21 years-old. I currently weigh 289lbs,which I am ashamed of. I am currently a size 22/24. I would like to set a goal of at least wearing a 14/16. It seems to be more realistic. I have suffered with weight gain and loss my whole life. I come from a family were most of the women are heavier set.

I have been though alot and I think alot of that has to do with my weight. I am an emotional eater. When I am upset or stressed, I eat. I have suffered through a lot of emotion and physical turmoil.

I was emotinally unstable. I have a eating disorder, most people probably look at me and say "lay of the groceries"  or "OMG, she is so fat" but what most of you dont know is I had my world come trumbling down 3 years ago when my mother and father spilt up(Now together again) but my mom cheated. My dad hated me because he thought I knew.  My brother moved in with my aunt.

I didnt graduate highscholl because I was more concerned with keeping my brother stable. I lost stablilty for myself. I turned to emotional turmoil but eating and sometime puking everynight or physical turmoil such a cutting my wrist to 'rid the pain'.

I was a mess and still am kinda but I am starting to get back on track. I am going for my GED in June, I start college in October.  I have a job, the cutting stopped, now I just need to get this weight off.

BUT.............................I am scared.