Day 1

As I sit here looking back through pics of my weight loss journey I cannot help but feel disappointed in myself. On my 30th Bday (2 yrs ago) I decided I needed to be healthy and lose the 50lbs I was carrying around with me. I didn't eat well, I didn't exercise at all, so I went hell bent for leather on the weight loss band wagon. I joined the gym and was dedicated to going after work everyday. At first It was hard as anybody who is just starting out knows, then it became easier. I tried new machines, threw in some free weights and within 3 months, I was down that 50 lbs. I look at it now and can truthfully say I was close to starving myself and made sure I burned more than I ate. My problem was that when I got to the weight I wanted, I let myself eat more, skipped a day here and there at the gym till I just stopped going all together. I gained a couple pounds but my clothes still fit so I didn't think about it to much. I had fallen out of the habits I had made for myself and was returning to the comfort of food. Extra stress at home caused by the economy, marriage issues and kids didn't help and I am a stress eater so more weight piled on. Then Denial begins, my mind would not wrap around what I saw happening in the mirror. Now, 2 years later, the majority of the weight has returned and I am able to see me for who I am. I am fat. I see my children eat nasty processed foods without any thought to the calories or the crap that goes into these foods and blame myself for it. Luckily both of my children take after their father and are slim but their futures may look like me. So, I am here today challenging myself to lose this weight to be healthy not just for myself but for my family. I am 32 years old and have so many active years ahead of me. I want to be able to live them to the fullest not from a chair watching life go by. So, today is Day 1 of my life.